Friday, July 31, 2009

eminem verbally murders mariah carey

If you're not a weirdly obsessed Mariah Carey fan (cough Billy cough), then you may not know that Carey and Eminem have been in song duel basically centered around the fact that they one time had sex. You can read more about it here. Carey's latest single "Obsessed" was evidently aimed at Eminem.

Eminem has fired back with "The Warning" and he definitely hits the mark. Carey evidently forgot who she was dealing with. Slim Shady is hanging on by a very thin thread and I dig that about him.

This is the kind of verbal destruction you can expect me to do to the Oddsmakers all season.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

chris cooley clowns cowboys

Not only is Chris Cooley probably the coolest guy in the NFL. Not only does he choose himself on his own fantasy team. He also makes low budget videos of questionable quality making fun of other NFL players - much like myself.

In these installments, Cooley pokes fun at Jason Witten and Tony Romo.

Fantasy Files from Tanner Cooley on Vimeo.

Fantasy Files 2 from Tanner Cooley on Vimeo.


Wednesday, July 29, 2009

tony romo is a stone cold killer

This news breaking the National Enquirer, I'm not sure how much I trust it, but I desperately want it to be true so I am going to pretend it is.

More fallout breaking from the Jinxica Simpson-Tony Romo breakup. Apparently, Romo didn't just break up with Yokoromo right before her birthday. He didn't just break her off because she wouldn't stop trying to get him to marry her. He did it in an IHOP parking lot and now has put her on red alert.

No joke. There is a sign outside Romo's house that says "RED ALERT" to let people know that Simpson is persona non grata at the Romo estate these days.

If Romo will be this kind of cold-blooded killa on the field, his fantasy owners will be very happy to have him this season.

Rubbing further salt in Jessica Simpson wounds ex-BF Tony Romo tells her to Get out and STAY OUT!

Bad enough he dumps her in the parking lot of an IHOP in Texas and then disses her by not showing to her B-day Ken & Barbie bash but when the Dallas QB gets a chance to sack instead of being sacked he didn't miss the opportunity to drop kick Jessica all the way out of the Lone Star state.

According to reports, tough guy Tony instructed security to keep the simpering blonde out of his posh gated community.


Click here for the full article...

(HT: Rome)

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

ridiculous athletic feats on youtube

ever since adrian wilson pumped himself up before the combine with youtube videos of superhuman agility and strength, youtube has been the venue of choice for young athletes trying to one up each other. check a few of these videos out below.

jump out the pool on that!

Monday, July 27, 2009

@behindnumbers live tweeting #TheTOShow tonight!

lt2, romo top list of players on the hot seat

Mike Florio weighs in for The Sporting News on ten players who should be feeling the heat this year. Double-edged sword for your fantasy team. These guys have something to prove, but if they fail - it could be the end of the line.
10-Pack: These players should feel the heat in '09
It's time for several veterans, including McNabb, Tomlinson and Bush, to put up or shut up

As camps begin to open, there's no shortage of articles focusing on specific issues facing NFL teams.

Let's take a look at specific players and the real pressure they're facing in 2009.

Pressure to perform. Pressure to validate their salaries. Pressure to stay in the cities where their careers unfolded. Pressure to craft their legacies.

Here are 10 of them (in no particular order):

1. Chargers RB LaDainian Tomlinson
Earlier this year, it appeared L.T. was going to get the Shaun Alexander treatment in San Diego. Somehow, the Chargers and the 2006 league MVP worked out a compromise that keeps him around at likely more money than he'd make anywhere else.

But it's by no means an arrangement that will allow Tomlinson to retire in San Diego. To force another year of big money from the Chargers, he must have another big season — and to find a way to stay healthy come January.

L.T. says turning 30 won't diminish his skills. If he's right, he'll be the exception to the rule.

If he's wrong, '09 likely will be his last season in San Diego, and possibly his last in the NFL.

2. Cowboys QB Tony Romo
The Cowboys have admitted they cut receiver Terrell Owens to clear out the primary impediment to Romo's genuine leadership.

If Romo were a genuine leader, he would have found a way to get Owens under control.

Romo, who was undrafted and who has achieved more than he or anyone else ever dreamed possible, seems content with his level of success.

He'd better find a way to raise his threshold for contentment in '09. With Owens gone, so are the excuses. Romo must take the team to the playoffs and must win at least one game when he gets there.

Otherwise, Romo could be done in Dallas. Sure, owner Jerry Jones will say he fully intends to keep Romo, no matter how bad it gets.

After all, that's what Jones said about T.O.

3. Bills QB Trent Edwards
In two short years, Edwards has displaced a first-round pick and has claimed the starting job in Buffalo. But toppling J.P. Losman was easy compared to what's coming.

You see, there's a new sheriff in Buffalo. And his name isn't Reggie Hammond.

It's Terrell Owens.

The fans adore T.O. In their eyes, the fact he has rescued the franchise from a decade of irrelevance excuses in advance any problems he might cause. Owens has plenty of influence over the fan base, which means Edwards had better keep T.O. happy.

4. Rams QB Marc Bulger
The veteran St. Louis quarterback hasn't done much the past two seasons to earn the huge contract he signed nearly two years ago.

With a general manager and a head coach who have both arrived since the money was paid to Bulger, he knows the time to make a difference is now.

With Michael Vick soon available, Bulger's window of opportunity might have shrunk from a year to a month. If the Rams sign Vick, Bulger would have to do enough during Vick's season-opening suspension to justify keeping Vick on the bench once he's cleared to play.

With or without Vick, if Bulger doesn't turn things around quickly he could find himself benched in favor of career underachiever Kyle Boller.

5. Bears QB Jay Cutler
Well, he got what he wanted: He forced a trade out of Denver, and he'll likely get a big, fat contract before too long.

Now, he has to deliver.

Cutler will have to overcome the reality that Chicago's receivers aren't as good as they were in Denver. Then again, maybe the quarterback had a lot to do with the quality of the wideouts? Either way, we'll find out soon the answer to this chicken-and-egg riddle.

For Cutler's sake, he'd better hope that great quarterbacks dramatically improve the output of otherwise mediocre pass catchers.
Click here for the other five...

Sunday, July 26, 2009

suspension for vick would be double jeopardy

As you guys know, I am a Michael Vick fan. Always have been. Always will be. Did he do something criminal and heinous? Yes. Did he deserve punishment? Of course. But he didn't kill a person. (cough, cough Donte Stallworth) He has paid a huge price for his actions - his money, his reputation, his freedom, his "next big thing" status - a price I believe to be too high already. It is time to let him back into society and into the NFL.

In his column for the Kansas City Star, Jason Whitlock argues that suspending Vick feels like double jeopardy. I agree.

Goodell shouldn't punish Vick
By Jason Whitlock
Kansas City Star

It feels like double jeopardy.

Michael Vick spent more than a year in prison for financing an illegal dog-fighting operation. He lost a fortune, a career as a franchise quarterback and his reputation.

Now that he’s paid a rather sizeable debt to society, why impose a suspension upon his return to the NFL?

I don’t get it. It seems unfair that commissioner Roger Goodell is ready to suspend Vick for two to six games (according to ESPN) at the beginning of the 2009 season. Let the man rejoin society.

I’m not a Michael Vick fan or supporter. I don’t see him as some sort of tragic victim of a racist criminal justice system. Arrogance and ignorance placed Vick behind bars. He underachieved as an NFL quarterback primarily because he wasn’t mature enough to prepare and carry himself like a pro.

And, quite honestly, I won’t be surprised if Vick once again spectacularly collides with public stupidity. My belief is there are too many people ready to tell him he did nothing wrong.

But it’s still America, and Vick deserves an unimpeded second chance. He’s been punished more than enough. Additional punishment isn’t going to make Vick anymore logical or mature.

At this moment, forgiveness and acceptance would help Vick more than Goodell playing the role of irate parent.

We make re-entry into the mainstream too difficult for ex-cons. We act like incarceration isn’t enough. It is, especially in the case of Michael Vick. ...

top ten nfl touchdown celebrations

The NFL should never outlaw or punish creativity. If you don't want to get shown up don't give up touchdowns.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

random saturday thoughts

comic-con is this weekend. largest annual gathering of guys who will never see a woman naked.

Is there any difference between Darius Rucker's "Alright," Montgomery Gentry's "Lucky Man," and Lonestar's "From my Front Porch Looking in?" They are all songs about being happy to have a house and a family. Isn't this just like rappers talking about hoes and Rolls? They just appreciate different things.

At what point will email go extinct. Or when can I legitimately say I will no longer respond or communicate by email? Take, for example, watching movies at home. If you invite me over to watch a movie on a VCR, I can legitimately say that's ridiculous, get a DVD player. But if you have a DVD player, I can't really complain you don't have a Blu-Ray player. That would just be petty. Email is a DVD player but at some point we are going to get to the point in society where we demand Blu-Rays.

A.J. bought a bag to put his clothes in that will go in his bag that he takes to Europe. Yes, a bag for his bag. He spent money on that.

Hypothetical: A European gypsy throws her baby at you. Do you a) drop your bags to catch the baby knowing that as soon as you do the gypsy will scoop them up and run off with them or do you b) let the baby fall to the ground but keep your bags? (Billy has already weighed in with: "It ain't my baby.")

Twitter symbology

RT = ReTweet - a retweet is copying and posting another twitterer's tweet as your own. when you do this, you give them credit by inserting RT before their message to let people know the content is not your own. (Exa. @behindnumbers RT everything that Jim Rome says)

@ = the @ symbol goes before a person's twitter name. if you are replying to a message or want to direct your message to a specific person instead of just the general twitterverse, put @ before their name (Exa. @Krabbits your team sucks and your writing is inferior to mine)

# = this goes before a hashtag. a hashtag is a search term in twitter. in my messages, you will see a lot of #btn. this is because I want you to be able to find all of my posts tagged that way in a search. (Exa. @TheInstitute's jokes are #fail)

D = direct message. A direct message is a private message sent to only one person. No one else on Twitter will see it but the person you send it to. (Exa. D @LizNorris u want to come over again tonight?)

If you are new to Twitter, download It will change your life and make your experience on the Twitter machine infinitely better.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

behind the numbers season 3 promo

A very special announcement about the future of behind the numbers.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

holley wins place at cowboys camp on reality tv

Cowboys award roster spot to reality show winner

By Gregg Rosenthal

... I was probably one of the few people in the country looking forward to the finale of Michael Irvin's Fourth and Long show on Spike TV Monday.

The Roethlisberger story got in the way, and the show remains sitting on Tivo, so consider this a spoiler alert warning for the six people that don't want to know the ending.

Wideout Jesse Holley won the 10-week competition in a four man finale that included two receivers and two defensive backs. He will go to training camp with the Cowboys.

Holley, a member of the 2005 UNC national championship basketball team, certainly looks like a pro.

He's listed at 6-3, 215 pounds, and he runs a 4.5 forty.

Holley wasn't always the most impressive player on the show. Wideout Andrew Hawkins, who played at Toledo and in the CFL, made scintillating plays on a weekly basis.

In the end, Hawkins' size (5-8, 165) probably ended his chances of winning Dallas' 80th roster spot.

Irvin thinks Holley can compete in training camp.

"Outside of Roy Williams, I'm not looking at a guy that is head and shoulders above Jesse," Irvin said.

Former Cowboys special teams coach Joe Avezzano, who worked on the show, said Holley can be better than some of the backups the Cowboys have right now.

That remains to be seen. Holley will be one of eleven receivers in camp and most spots are accounted for. He will have to be a special teams demon.

The odds on Holley actually make the Cowboys roster or practice squad seem slim at best, but that was part of the show's charm. ...

Click here for the full story...

Monday, July 20, 2009

btn season 3

an all new season. all new features. still bringing you the best fantasy football news and analysis in the business.