behind the numbers week 6

Episode #308 features a fantasy football roundtable with President Obama, Rush Limbaugh, Jessica Simpson, and Kanye West as well as my take for The Protagonist.

omg, romo has a new gf

As much as I would like to pretend that celebrity gossip is below this blog...

It's not.

Besides I have a take on Tony Romo's new girlfriend.

It's time for an intervention.

Her name is Candice Crawford. She is a local Dallas Erin Andrews wannabe and former Miss Missouri. (Please raise your hand if you know any hot chicks from Missouri. That's what I thought.) But apparently, she is most famous for being the sister of actor Chace Crawford of Gossip Girl marginal fame. In fact, the brother actually hooked that up for Romo which would only be kind of weird except that right after Romo broke up with Carrie Underwood she dated Crawford. (That elevates it from marginally weird to sword-crossing Cruel Intentions kind of weird. I mean, what's next? Romo hooks up with Nick Lachey's cousin.)

I mean... she aight. But clearly Romo is on a downward spiral when it comes to fantasy dating. He went from the incredibly beautiful Carrie Underwood who seems to be relatively non-crazy by celebrity standards to the incredibly annoying Jinxica Simpson and her incredibly creepy dad to the relatively average (by celebrity standards) Candice Crawford.

Somebody needs to remind this guy he is QB1 for the Dallas Cowboys. You do not need to run marginally famous teeny bopper guy's sister game.

And you need to focus on football. Life in Dallas is not going to be nearly as interesting or productive without the wideout that everyone loves T.O. hate. I know your man crush on Jason Witten is not going to be enough to get you through those cold Texas nights, but you do work relatively close to the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders' dressing room. A man has needs. I get that. But a lot of people are counting on Romo to come through this year and he has already shown a propensity to let off-the-field drama affect his on-the-field performance.

It's time for Romo to decide whether he wants to be a flash-in-the-pan celebrity favorite of the papparazi or if he wants to be legendary football player and fan favorite for "America's team."

By the end of this season, we'll know the verdict on Romo's football career and his game.

tony romo is a stone cold killer

This news breaking the National Enquirer, I'm not sure how much I trust it, but I desperately want it to be true so I am going to pretend it is.

More fallout breaking from the Jinxica Simpson-Tony Romo breakup. Apparently, Romo didn't just break up with Yokoromo right before her birthday. He didn't just break her off because she wouldn't stop trying to get him to marry her. He did it in an IHOP parking lot and now has put her on red alert.

No joke. There is a sign outside Romo's house that says "RED ALERT" to let people know that Simpson is persona non grata at the Romo estate these days.

If Romo will be this kind of cold-blooded killa on the field, his fantasy owners will be very happy to have him this season.

Rubbing further salt in Jessica Simpson wounds ex-BF Tony Romo tells her to Get out and STAY OUT!

Bad enough he dumps her in the parking lot of an IHOP in Texas and then disses her by not showing to her B-day Ken & Barbie bash but when the Dallas QB gets a chance to sack instead of being sacked he didn't miss the opportunity to drop kick Jessica all the way out of the Lone Star state.

According to reports, tough guy Tony instructed security to keep the simpering blonde out of his posh gated community.

Posting a sign at the security station, Tony alerted staffers and the hood: RED ALERT!!! TONY ROMO HAS MADE SOME CHANGES TO HIS LIST OF PEOPLE ALLOWED IN....JESSICA IS NO LONGER ON THE LIST AND NOT APPROVED FOR ACCESS.

Click here for the full article...

(HT: Rome)